VIEWPOINT
AMITABH SHUKLA
When I went to cover Assembly
elections in Haryana a few weeks ago and hit the hinterland of the State, it
was strange to see that the youth in some areas demanding that there should be
a movement to increase the ratio of the girl child and they would vote only for
those who do that. They had also demanded that politicians should first arrange
for mass weddings of these youths before seeking their votes.
These youths, some of them
clearly on the wrong side of youth — in their late thirties and forties — were
yet to get a bride and had remained bachelors. For them, bachelorhood was a
compulsion and it was also a sort of social ostracism in the conservative
society where “normalcy” meant that you had a wife, children and you were
supporting them as a family.
I finally called one of the
bachelors with whom I had spoken for the story, which I did for The Pioneer. I
asked him which party he voted for and was there any candidate who supported
their cause. He did not name any party or candidate but said gradually, people
in Haryana were realising how bad female foeticide was and the sex ratio was
improving. “Our generation has suffered but the next generation has seen the
reality and the girl child was no longer a burden on the family,” he said.
It was a pleasant surprise to
find that the district administration in Rewari, considered a backward district
in the State, deciding to celebrate the birth of girl child from now on.
Anganwadi workers have been directed to distribute sweets and cut cakes by organising
a get-together with the villagers in their centres after the birth of the girl
child to celebrate the occasion. All expenditure will be provided by the
district authorities.
In Rewari district there are 856
girls against 1,000 boys, a figure considered quite low by any standards. This
is one of those districts where the population of unmarried males in their late
30s and 40s is quite high. Apart from the celebration of the birth of the girl
child, the authorities here would also celebrate first birthday of all female
children born after November 2013. There would be cake-cutting ceremony to
celebrate the first year of the girl child in the entire district. Obviously,
this would force the people to have a rethink on the way they were behaving earlier
and what should be the way forward.
I have been observing Haryana for
a while and this was one of the pleasant experiences when we reported the
story. The Rewari example should be replicated all over the state as a success
story as this is the way forward.
Sometime ago, what caught my
attention was the exploits of a con woman who was taking advantage of the
extremely skewed sex ratio in Haryana. The con woman was perpetually “marrying”
people and then running away with the booty from her so called husband’s house.
Taking advantage of the fact that men in the marriageable age, particularly
those from the family of marginal farmers, find it extremely difficult to get a
bride, the con woman used to “marry” a person after taking amount ranging from
Rs1 lakh to Rs1.5 lakh. This was not all.
She used to decamp with valuables
of the house when no one in her “marital” home was around.
She “married” five times but was
caught when trying the trick for the sixth time in a row. The woman, with the
help of her accomplices, had another trick up her sleeve. She used to threaten
her “husband” that she will approach police for harassing her for dowry lest he
part with an agreed amount and set her free. The hapless “husband” used to part
with the money and that was the last he saw of his “wife”.
Given the social conditions
prevailing in parts of rural Haryana, there could be several such con women
going around with their “business” without any problem. The “unfortunate” lady
was caught even though she “married” in different sub-divisions of the state.
The modus operandi was an eye opener. In my career in journalism, which took me
to different parts of the country over the years, I had never come across a
situation where such a trick was used to con people.
Then there are numerous “marriage
bureaus” in most of the towns which too are doing brisk business in the state.
Such marriage bureaus do exist in other parts of the country as well but what
is unusual about Haryana is that all of them only have eligible male bachelors
on their records. While in other parts of the country, groom seekers seek the
services of such bureaus, in Haryana, it is mainly the bride seekers who are
ready to pay through their nose, to get a bride using the services of such
match makers. Many of these “marriage bureaus” are fly-by-night operators who
run away with the money of those male
bachelors who are desperate to get brides.
Haunted by the dubious
distinction of being a State with the lowest sex ratio in the country at 877
females per 1,000 males as compared to the highest of 1084 males per 1,000
males in Kerala, the marriageable men of Haryana had never had it so bad.
While the rich farmers still
manage to get wives for their sons, though with great difficulty, the marginal
farmers and those on the edges find it extremely difficult to find a bride. No
wonder in their desperation, they resort to buying brides as they have to have
for somebody to do the domestic chores at house, look at their farms and
animals and also to meet their biological needs and desire for progeny. Here,
caste system goes for a toss. Nor is religion or the state from where the girl
hails from given any consideration. “After wedding, women belong to the caste
and the religion from where their husbands hail from,” goes the saying in the
rural belt. The “bride purchasers” have another reason and logic. “Beggars are
not choosers,” they say. And indeed in the marriage market, the eligible males
in some regions of the States are beggars.
With such a demand, triggered by
years of sex determination tests and resultant female foeticide, the
traffickers had never had it so good in the state, known otherwise for its
agriculture, sports and hardworking people. Recently, the Delhi Police busted a
gang that used to abduct young girls and sell them off to middle-aged men and
their brothers in Haryana as brides.
Ironically the sex ratio of 877 in Census 2011 is the highest
since 1901. This perhaps explains why there are few females in the marriageable
age in this northern State. Among the neighbouring States, sex ratio of Punjab
is a poor 893 though Himachal Pradesh is impressive with 974.
With the Pre-Natal Diagnostic
Techniques (PNDT) Act being enforced strictly and the State being watched
closely, optimists insist that things could improve say after 10-15 years. But
experts and gender analysts say that it could take at least 50 years to make up
for the loss and maintain a gender balance and that too only when things
continue to improve each passing month and year. It is here when a movement
needs to be built on celebrating the birth of a girl by the community and also
her first birthday. (December 1, 2014 )
